H said it has been more than a year. So I'm not horrible, but I've pushed him away for years. I would love it if he wrote a list of greivences or wrong doings. I don't think he knows WTH he can't stand me anymore.
Your H is probably so overwhelmed and confused right now that he couldn't verbalize his thoughts even if he wanted to. It really doesn't make any difference if it took a month, a year or whatever for you to push him away. It happened, it's done, you can't change it. I would probably avoid conversations like this if at all possible, as they really don't help matters at all - All that really happens is that you reaffirm his belief that there is a reason for him to leave.
From what I'm hearing, he certainly isn't behaving as if he can't stand you. Things aren't perfect, but he's around almost every day and seems to want to participate in family activities.
