Sounds like you and your W are in a power struggle - she says she wants you to go, acts as if she wants you to go, yet you won't go. I get it. My H and I were in the same power struggle for months. MY C mentioned a similiar circle idea to me and that allowed me to let my H go. I finally saw him as someone that was truly struggling with his identity - sounds like your W is doing the same. I released my H from all of his "husbandly" duties. I just said, "H, I release you. I will no longer work on our R, suggest we do things together, go places together, try to fix this, etc. You are free to date whoever you would like, whenever, where ever. This is your life and you are free to do what you would like with it." I meant it and still do. It allowed him to make the decisions he needed to make for HIM, not for me, or the M. And he's made the right decisions. Things aren't great between us, but it's a heck of lot less stressful. Just my 2 cents.
Me: 34 H: 39 M: 7 yrs H A 12/05-8/07
If what you say surprises me, I must have been assuming something else was true. - M. Wheatley
