Don't get down about her wanting to move in with the parents. Even if the past little while has been great, it's surely waaaay too soon for her to think "In 2 months everything will be fine so I'll just move back with B."
And moving in with the parents is really the best result besides coming back. She can move away from there at any time, it leaves her options open--maybe after this extra 1 or 2 months she will be ready to recommit, who knows. Anyway, it's much better than re-signing for another 6-12 months in her apartment.
Have a great date tonight!
Me: 43 W: 41 Together 2009, Married 2011 Sons 10 and 6, Daughter 5 Bomb 2/21/21. W moved out 10/2021
Thanks guys. I definitely see the positives. What I struggle with the most right now is not over doing it. Trying to squash my expectations. Not trying to put a time line on what the future holds. I have to hold back and play it cool. I realize that I have to look at what is happening as a beginning to a new relationship. Did I want to marry her the first day I met her? No. Did I love her the first day that I met her? No. That all took time to build up to. It sucks going through it all again, but if there was one person in the world that I would do it for, it's her.
Woog, I used to be able to tell you the weeks/days/hours/minutes since she told me she was leaving. That internal clock stopped running a couple weeks ago though. I could figure it out, but it would only drag me down. I look towards the future now and I do take it all one day at a time. You'll get there too. Detachment is the key...
Me: 29 W: 28 T: 10 M: 7 No kids 2 Dogs and 1 Cat With Parents: 09/16/07 Apartment: 10/13/07 Back Home: ~2/16/2008
Well tonight was date night. It didn't last as long as I wanted it to, but there I go again with expectations. We were together 2 1/4 hours and I know that I had a good time. We had a good dinner at one of her favorite restaurants. Then we went out by the lake and talked for a while. We got out and ran around in the snow, had a snowball fight and took some pictures. We looked around a little for a coffee place, but couldn't find one on that end of town. She kept saying that she had to get up early and went through her entire weekend plans. I didn't push to stay together longer, but she made some comments like she wanted to. She seemed conflicted about whether to go or not. So I made the decision for her and let her go.
Overall, it was a nice time. I had too many expectations again. I need to learn to stop putting them on our time together. It's hard not to, but I'm going to try.
I'm saving the best for last though. She was wearing her wedding ring tonight!!! She caught me looking at it but I made sure that I didn't make any comments. I felt my heart skip a beat though. Happy days.
Me: 29 W: 28 T: 10 M: 7 No kids 2 Dogs and 1 Cat With Parents: 09/16/07 Apartment: 10/13/07 Back Home: ~2/16/2008
The most ironic part of her wearing her ring is that I haven't had the chance to get mine resized yet... So I wasn't wearing it... I hope that I didn't cause any ill feelings because of it. I'm just so happy that she had hers on. It's definitely an answered prayer.
B
Me: 29 W: 28 T: 10 M: 7 No kids 2 Dogs and 1 Cat With Parents: 09/16/07 Apartment: 10/13/07 Back Home: ~2/16/2008
She also called last night. She said that she wanted to make sure that I made it home ok. She said that she worries about me driving around in the Jeep that I just got. She thinks they tip over easy. She also wanted me to send her the pictures that we took which she had already asked me to do earlier in the night. There really wasn't any reason for her to call other than she wanted to talk to me some more.
Me: 29 W: 28 T: 10 M: 7 No kids 2 Dogs and 1 Cat With Parents: 09/16/07 Apartment: 10/13/07 Back Home: ~2/16/2008
Lots of positive things going on for you. I am happy to hear about them. It sounds as if she is liking the time you are spending together. I understand your concerns with expectations and patience. I am dealing with those as well right now in a huge way. Since my WAW moved back in 2 days ago it has been hard to spend idle time with her when I can tell that her feelings for me are not what mine are for her. I hope that one day I will see her catching up. Until then, you and I may be getting the know the word "patience" more intimately than anything. Have faith and keep the positive things going. Good news!
ME-30 WAW-28 T-12yrs M-5yrs no kids Bomb 10/1/07 S-10/1/07
Something else new that I forgot to report. After adamantly refusing my want to get her a Christmas present, she changed her tune last week. I told her what I wanted to get her (a snowboard, used one since I can't afford a brand new one since she left...) and sent a picture of it to her. We're going to check it out Monday night. It's about a 45 min drive one way and I'm planning on seeing if she wants to get dinner too. It should make for a nice evening.
I see this as a positive thing that she's willing to let me buy her a present. She's not the type of person who would use me just to get what she wants. She feels too guilty if she does.
Maybe I'm just crazy and am looking at this all wrong, but I felt good about it. Any thoughts?
Me: 29 W: 28 T: 10 M: 7 No kids 2 Dogs and 1 Cat With Parents: 09/16/07 Apartment: 10/13/07 Back Home: ~2/16/2008
