H is a true mess. He called me after he got off work last night and was so depressed. He kept asking me to come down to his parent's house to be with him, but the weather was bad and it was late. He kept saying he doesn't know what to do. He kept talking about all of the failures that he has had.
Fast forward to today. D12 and I had shopping plans. H called as we were walking out the door. I told him where we were going and that he was welcome to join us if he wanted. He broke down in histerics. I felt so bad. While we were out he sent a tm to me to have a good time shopping.
When we got home d12 tm that we were there. He arrived shortly after. I was baking cookies and d12 and he cuddled a bit on the couch. She then showed him the outfit we bought for her chorus concert on wed. and he broke down in tears.
He went in to my bedroom and laid in the fetal position crying histerically. He kept saying how tired he was. He kept apologizing and saying he doesn't know what to do. He kept talking about the failures in his life and how he can't make anyone happy. I told him to take one day at a time. I really didn't say too much.
I just don't know what this man wants. He is truly depressed. H said that he is so sad he doesn't remember what it feels like to be happy. Not sure if all of this is how he truly feels .....or what. I am so skeptical.
I did tell H to call after he got out of work if he wanted to. It was up to him. I will be here. I can't fix this for him though. I think he wants someone to tell him what to do and that someone will not be me.
So, that was my day in a nutshell. Did bake some great ricotta cookies. Went out to dinner with my dad and the kids stayed home. S15 wants chocolate chip cookies, so I think I will make those tonight for him.
Who knows what the rest of the night will bring. I can't sit and dwell and speculate as I am never sure where this wild ride will take me next.
