I'd posted this in the I'm thinking about leaving forum earlier today but since I keep getting drawn to the MLC forum thought I'd post this here instead:
Hello all
I am not a stranger to these boards but I suppose all those that I knew have long since moved on.
A brief re-cap:
Me: 35 H: 37 Married: 8
I found out that my husband was having an affair early January 2005. The nightmare that followed is, I suppose fairly, commonplace. In April or May 2006, I found out that the affair was still going strong and I decided that that was it for me. I totally detached and began to take steps to separate. In early Jan, H began to talk about a future and things began to markedly improve. We bought a house, started a new business venture and began to make long term plans.
I found out a couple of months ago, that he is either still having the affair or has never ended it. Anyway, the affair is still on. Things at home are unbelievably horrible. H accuses me of being a horrible wife, of ruining his life, of forcing him to marry me, of being a nasty human being. He speaks angrily to me all the time and expects me to bend over backwards for him at all times. He expects me to continue to contribute to the marriage without expecting anything in return. He resents every penny he pays towards household expenses and accusses me of trying to cheat him of his money and of trying to use him.
I am really really tired. I just want to leave with my head high and I want to be able to rise above it all and its so difficult. Today for example, he got up in the morning and no matter what the situation, he answered with absolute rudeness and with so much anger in the tone. For example, 'Ei, i want to put these clothes in the washer dryer and I want to dry them in there as well. I dont want to dry them on the clothes line'. The 'ei' was so derogatory in tone that its hard to describe.
I was supposed to pick him up from the high street today. D and I were at a shopping centre 15 min away and he called to say he was ready to be picked up. So D and I got in the car; but hit a really really bad patch of traffic. A 15 min journey took us 30 min and he was nasty about this as well.
I'm on this board for support and strength as I move towards leaving him. Any advice, support and suggestions would be very very welcome.
I know that most of those who are here in the forum are trying to save their marriage; but I am strongly beginning to suspect that my H is going through an MLC and I just really need some support. Thanks.
