Okay, ewe -- finally found the time to go deep into your question. Sorry for the length. I kind of got out of control!
Okay, outward stuff first:
Like CVA (and most guys, I'm sure), I like a woman that is in good shape, but not super toned or anything. Sometimes I like them with a little meat on them, too -- it just depends. What initially attracts me -- in no particular order -- is their eyes, hair, smile, and butt. I'm not a fan of really big breasts. I really like naturally curly or wavy, blonde hair, as well as glowing/sparkling blue eyes and a radiant smile. Eyes/smiles that show so much life within her. It's hard to describe these last two things very well, so that's the best I can do. I guess if the eyes and smile show me someone who is genuinely happy and someone who looks like they are very caring/loving, I'm pretty hooked and drawn to them. As far as the butt goes (I feel kind of awkward talking about this), I like them to be plump, but in shape, as well as well-proportioned to the rest of their body. I also like them to be stylish in what they wear, and conscious of what accentuates their best features and what they should avoid for their personal body type.
So, if you're in a room with 9 other good looking, well taken care of women who smell good, the above outward features are what will initially set you apart for me.
What is attractive to me in regard to attitude/behavior:
I'm pretty sure I can speak for most men when I say I don't like a woman whose confidence comes across as cocky in any way. Major turn off (i.e. if she's cute, she's just become a 1 night stand with that attitude). If I can tell she's only flirting with me to see if she can attract me or win me over -- not because she is genuinely interested in me -- I'm not interested. So, the line between confidence and cockiness is definitely distinguishable for me. Self-absorbed women need not apply.
I like a woman who shows interest in me but isn't throwing herself at me either. A little challenge makes me desire them a little more. However, if she's too shy then I don't believe she's interested and I likely won't pursue her at all. That being said, a woman who seems a little too easy for me to nab and potentially "bag" that night causes me to lose interest. So, I think I'm different from CVA in that I'm not real fond of aggressive behavior from a woman I've just met. Now, if later on she's aggressive in the sack, that's a whole different story... If I'm in a relatively serious relationship with a woman, I very much like a lot of physical touch (not necessarily sexual at all either -- just intimate and loving) and the occasional sexually aggressive actions so I know she's physically attracted to and aroused by me. I don't want to have to make all of the sexual advances in a relationship.
Also, a woman who is genuinely sweet, nice, etc, and shows that to me early on, can really win me over. I like a woman with an air of innocence about her. Someone with a big heart. Women who love to gossip and talk trash about others people, women, etc, lose attractiveness for me. A good sense of humor is a plus too, but not the sarcastic kind. I'm not sure how to explain it, but the fun/humor should be positive and good-natured. A woman who has or creates a lot of drama in her life and carries it everywhere she goes can keep on going -- I don't want to be weighed down with that.
A good amount of honesty is good, as long as the candor in how it is presented isn't overly blunt or insincere. With honesty, if a woman is trying to relate to my interests as if they are hers too, yet I can tell they really aren't, I'm disappointed in their desperateness for my approval/acceptance. Be your own person -- I don't mind having different interests than you. That's not a deal breaker for me at all. On the flip side of this token, if your honesty ends up showing your disapproval or disgust/distaste in something that I like, enjoy, etc, and you are basically putting down or minimizing my interest in something, I'm pretty put off. Thus, the honesty is really all about presentation -- being conscious of those around you when you state your opinion, but without jeopardizing your own ideas, beliefs, feelings, etc, at the same time.
I also like an intelligent or intellectual girl. Someone who can articulate their thoughts well and with some sophistication. Like I said above, she should be sweet, but also be able to demonstrate that she has a fully functioning thinker upstairs. She must be able to think deeply and objectively with me on abstract issues; someone who is always willing to grow in their understanding and opinions of things, and who can retract statements when they gain new insight that changes the way they originally look at something (i.e. have that beautiful thing called confident humility). They are intelligent, yet perfectly content with being wrong now and then.
Okay, I think that's all I've got for now, but I'm pretty sure that covers most everything for me. Hope this helps you, ewe. What are your thoughts on this?
Oh yeah, and now it's your turn -- what is physically & emotionally attractive to you regarding men? I'm also curious as to what the average women thinks about a big, buff guy vs a more slender and toned, athletic guy.
