My H had a profile on match.com as soon has he moved out. He started dating as soon as he moved out. He came to me 3 weeks later and said that we should "date" but that he wanted to date others "platonically". I should have told him to take a flying leap at that point. But I didn't.
My H seems to think that I will always be here for him. And I don't know whether the "Nothing is Forever" statement is intended to make sure I am hooked in enough to hang around waiting even AFTER the divorce, or if it is him trying to make himself feel better that he can count on me to be waiting, but either way, he needs to know that I am NOT going to wait around.
Is it really the right thing for ME to be dating? Well, at the risk of being chastised and being told that 'two wrongs don't make a right', was it right for my H to be dating as soon as he MOVED OUT? Now that my H is in such a rush to get a divorce, why *shouldn't* I be able to go on a date?
I am very confused how someone can say in the exact same conversation that "I want to hurry up and move on" and "nothing is forever" re divorce. If a person really thinks there could be a chance, why are they leaving?????? and why in such a hurry????? I think that is 'proof' that he is confident I will wait for him. And I was a total dufus and said a couple days ago that I knew he would be back. Ugh. dumb dumb dumb. Of course, 12 years ago when he broke up with me, I (totally calm) said "ok. that's fine. you'll be back." and he was impressed with that. And he was back within 2 weeks. Probably not a good hand to play this time point in our relationship.
I am too tired to ask for retrouvaille. I already mentioned it (again) in our IM "conversation." He would have said something about it if he were the least bit interested.
I think he wants to come over tomorrow to talk more about stuff. I am not going to pussyfoot around with him anymore. I am sick and tired of trying to be understanding and all that crap. I mean, what's he going to do?? fast track the divorce?? Oh wait, he's already doing that.
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
