I think he knows that you are afraid of losing him after the EA and he is using emotional blackmail on you. Can't you see that? Why else would he constantly throw the OM up to you? Just don't let him get away with doing you that way any longer and you will see some positive changes. He may get ugly or threaten D or whatever before it gets better, but you can't go on living like this and I don't think he'll do anything but get worse.

Good luck and let me hear how it goes.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!