What a good year this has been.....

[Kman]

I'm not sure I can take much credit for him trying something new.

I really disagree on this here - his pattern has been to try positive or negative influence on you to get what he wants - him coming to the table to work as a team is only because that's the only choice you've left him with, I think.

He was still trying to call all the shots when we spoke yesterday.

Trying.He can't succeed unless you let him.

but for some reason he wanted to continue the convo.

At first, because he was continuing to probe and find out what would work to get what he wanted; then when that failed, to see what he would have to agree to...

He told me I can't go to school, that I have to just get a job.

Sounds perfect...for him.

He finally decided he'd take a 10 minute time out and call back.

Again, on his terms and what HE needed.


I know this is really tough, and that your emotions are all over the place from one day to the next and even from one hour to the next. But you are really doing well here. You set a very significant precedent by not giving in to the quit claim thing, now you can build on that. I guarantee you that he sat up and noticed when, after he pulled out ALL the stops to get the quit claim signed, he still failed to make you do what he wanted. And the key word there is make - because, as I recall, at NO POINT during that episode were you comfortable signing that, yet he continued to push and push and push. And yet you stayed strong.

Now you are in the negotiation phase. At times you may tend to beat yourself up for things you did or didn't do during the M. He may even do the same (who knows). But never forget that you are at this point for a reason (many reasons, more realistically). Do your best not to let that those doubts influence getting a fair and equitable settlement out of this, where you are aware of all the numbers, facts, etc. That's the reality of the situation AT THIS TIME, and I as well as others here have seen the strength that you have that will get you to the finish line.

And first and foremost, no matter what, treat yourself well - you deserve it.

Kev