WAW staying, I'm leaving to give her space..

[jab]

COG,

I love your attitude and open mind. Don't ask me why, but AmyC assembled the "A-Team" for ya.

That, I believe, is divine intervention, my friend. I don't know why either but I truly believe that I have a 'guardian angel'. There have been signs lately in other forms that I cannot explain, but I know I am not alone in this.

I moved out at my W's request. I think it was the right thing for us because I was driving her friggin crazy. Couldn't just leave things alone. I was constantly starting conversations about our R. Pressuring, guilting, never let things rest. We were both miserable and I hadn't found DB yet.

This is the original reason why I agreed to move out. Since then, I have found DB, gotten a grip & realized what I was doing wrong, what I should be doing, and what I am truly capable of. I didn't think I could do it at first, but know I can now. I do care very deeply about how she feels and her needs.

As far as your other questions, my answer is 'yes' I can do it.
I'm not sure where my sitch will end up but I love her with all my heart, always did, always will. I am already accepting and forgiving what I thought I NEVER would be able to accept and forgive. If I get to the point where I don't think I can, I'll re-evaluate.

I'm going to quote what I said in AA last meeting:
"I believe this is happening for a 'reason' and good will come out of it no matter what happens. I believe that strength comes through suffering, and I'll be one strong motherf***** after all this is over, that's for sure. I've been weak too long."

There may come time/challenges when you'll have to decide if you can accept her actions and stay with her, or not. But make that choice based on the reality of who she is, not on the hope of transforming her what you want her to be. She should know what your boundaries are, but she should not be coerced, manipulated, begged, or controlled by YOU to follow them. Leave that up to her and her God.

Pray for me. Give me strength to do God's will.