I concur w/ exile and IC, 100%. I tried to explain this same thing a while back IRT my own ch*t, and no one would hear it.
but anyway, if you've played at a big-league level, its damn near impossible (at least, for some of us) to go back to "little league". It must be hard for others to understand, especially when it involves pursuits that most people do for recreation. "why can't you just do it for fun?". Because, even though we started these pursuits as an "extracurricular" activity in our youth, (or "whenever"), for those who rise to a professional level, at some point, it stops being "fun", and starts being "work". Not "work" as in "drudgery", but "work" as in "purpose". Fulfillment comes from working at a top-shelf level, not from simply participating.
something I haven't talked about much, here...I was once a professional level musician. I have a degree in music performance, and played at a fairly high level for some time. Some of my peers have gone on to play with some pretty big names. I could have pursued that...I chose not to. (cue Stuart Smalley: "and thats...ok"). had other goals, that I dont' need to get into. Anyway, I just kind of slowly grew away from the music, as life moved on, to the point of not really doing much of anything anymore. But people are always telling me, "you should do this", or "you should do that"..."play with this amateur group, or that one...sing in this choir"...whatever. No, thankyou. Not interested. The few times I have, have been nothing but annoying and frustrating. counterproductive, imo. (funny aside: W keeps getting sucked into these things...then comes home after every rehersal, and goes on a tirade about how annoying and frustrating it is...and I say, "see? see why I don't want to get involved?" \:\/ anyway...).
Now, one big difference between my analogy, and IC's story is that there hasnt' been any life-altering event that makes it **impossible** to pursue again. Its not necessarily "gone forever", (like some other things). But thats really not the point. The point is that a cheap knock-off is not substitute for "the real thing", when you're trying to fill some void.
So I understand IC's actions, completely.