Separation rarely leads to reconciliation. However I do agree that the important thing is that Hap identify what she wants. I understand that a big part of the answer is to "be happy". If you do try some kind of trial separation I would encourage you to do it with boundaries and agreements in place.
What is it that your H thinks he can't do? Does he want to give up because he thinks he has tried and it hasn't made a difference and he wants to hide out emotionally or does he think another R would be different or does he just want a clean slate? His reasoning matters greatly in how I would address the issue.
