Ooh good idea WCW - I used to ride in one of those programs and those horses were VERY well cared for. They need to be very mellow and well trained - they may have people mounting from the "off" side, using walkers or wheelchairs, things like that that can spook some horses - but cliffy if your horse(s) would qualify that might be a good option to temporarily house them without having to get rid of them.
If the goal is just to cut the monthly expense you could possibly "loan" one or more horses to them. If they're anything like the place I used to go they would probably keep the horses at their stable and take care of them (including all the expenses). Here's a site with a lot more info and a facility locator, if you're interested in this option: http://www.narha.org/
Hope you are doing well!! I know this isn't easy.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
Thanks for checking back in girls! I appreciate it. I will get an update together in the next day or so, it has been very hectic lately, swim meets and parent teacher conferences this week. It has been a leave the house at 6am get home at 11pm kinda week. As far as the horses, thanks for the advice. The hitch in the program is to cut monthly expenses, the extra cash from a sale would be nice, but not needed. One of the horses would be well suited for this type of program, the other is just to high strung. Great advice, I will see what I can find as far as loaning or leasing.
Update time, I am still in the house as it looks like the apartment will be in use for at least another month. No big deal, I am still DB'ing but have been very lax about it, just going with the flow. I have blown up at W a time or two the past week or so and don't see much difference. She has been gone since sunday evening with OM and bff. I am never sure when she is coming or going lately, but it is just taken in stride. I broke down this morning, before kicking off another early day and long night and sent the following text. "regardless of what the future of our m holds, I want you to be happy! I would love for this to be with me as your husband in every sense of the word, but if not, sobeit. I am thankful for the lessons learned in this time of uncertainty and that I have chosen to love, unconditionally. You and ss have been an inspiration to me. I love you both with all I can!" Probably a bad move, but I woke up and felt like saying it. Of course, no response and she wasn't home when I got in. I have been irritated, frustrated, etc. because she is moving so far away after having a seemingly great connection just last week. Oh well, such is the journey. I think I have been fairly consistant, just a little showing a bit more emotion. Time to back off, and focus on the stuff I need to do.
I think that was just fine, cliffy... there's a time to share your feelings and I don't think you said anything wrong at all.
Sorry for the irritation/frustration, sure know what you mean there.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
As Nikki said , nothing wrong with that , I dont think we should be afraid of sharing feelings , its different to begging and crying which I think we all got past a long time ago. You have said it , now let it be for a while .
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Time to back off, and focus on the stuff I need to do.
Yep
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I have been irritated, frustrated, etc. because she is moving so far away after having a seemingly great connection just last week.
Cliffy, It sure does sound like you need the separation. The frustration comes from a lack of true detachment from her sitch. She is obviously conflicted and is riding her own personal roller-coaster. Just stick to your path and try to stay detached.
BTW, I have been using yoga breathing/meditation techniques to just let these waves of frustration roll over me, feel them, experience them, and let them go. Works wonders for me, after a minute or so, it is over and I am back to Mr. PMA! If you try it, you might like it, esp. if you find a class full of hot, limber women!
SD
Me 41 W 41 Kids: S9 S7 Married 16 years Bomb dropped 2/2/07 Still living together! current thread
she is moving so far away after having a seemingly great connection just last week
Pretty typical stuff, she is confused and pulls back after getting too close for comfort.
Have you made any progress with horsey homes? subzero temps here makes me think new homes for about 20 of mine would be a good idea! doing chores for 2 or 3 would be soooo much easier.
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BTW, I have been using yoga breathing/meditation techniques to just let these waves of frustration roll over me, feel them, experience them, and let them go. Works wonders for me, after a minute or so, it is over and I am back to Mr. PMA! If you try it, you might like it, esp. if you find a class full of hot, limber women!
Wow, I feel better just reading about yoga! Imagine if I actually DID it! whoooohoooo! I just returned a dvd to the library about yoga. Once I get doctor clearance I plan to actually get started with yoga. I also have a clinic set up for next year that combines yoga with riding your horse. Honest!
Stay steady cliffy. Eyes on the horizon.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
Two weeks since my last post. This is the longest I have been absent from the boards for over a year. SD, thanks for dropping by. I have been busy with swimming, we are working out 2x a day much of the week and have had 6 meets in the last two weeks. Lots of late nights and early mornings. In general however, I think I just needed a break from thinking about my sitch. So far the apartment is still on hold, the current renter decided to go month to month. I have still not found homes for a horse or two. So I am still in the house. Maybe a twist of fate for the holidays, but who really knows. W has made less excuses to go see OM and has been putting some effort into the house, not so much the R. We have been doing a bit more together. We actually spent much of the past two weekends cleaning, organizing, decorating for Christmas, etc. It has almost felt like normal H and W stuff, with little affection. No R talk just existing and getting along. When she has left a couple of times, she has given me a complete run down of what she did or was doing, without me asking. We actually spent time together over the past two weekends. The other biggie, is that she accepted the offer to get in my family's gift exchange and said she may go. First to be around my family in over a year. No expectations or pressure on this. I am also hearing alot more "we" talk. All babysteps and positives, but there is a long row to hoe either way this finally ends up. She also got a Dr. Phil relationship rescue DVD from her SIL, not sure who prompted it. There is still no idea where the road leads, I am just remaining steady and confident in who I am. If/when the apartment opens I still plan to make the move, unless the OM sitch either dies a natural death or she decides on us. She is still texting him quite a bit, I assume since I hear her phone ringing at odd times of the night and she is off to see him tonight. But oh well, been there done that, it is her decision. I quit holding some things in, and showing more emotion when needed. Usually not as it relates to OM. It has had some positive effect. I think. The break from thinking has helped and I am much more centered. It also doesn't hurt that I am busy doing my own thing so much. I feel completely "as if" and detached for a few weeks.
