But - one fear is that I draw a line in the sand - and she says, "ok, well, do what you have to do".
Two things are true. One is that if you didn't have that fear you already would have simply done "what you have to do". The second thing is that she may very well say that and even think that she means it but be kidding herself. She KNOWS you are unhappy so she has already reconciled the "worst-case scenario" books in her mind in order to continue her current behavior but she might not be a very fore-sighted bookkeeper.
Actually, a third thing is true. You are almost certainly more unhappy with your marriage than you know. Every time somebody comes to this BB and says "everything is great except for the sex" they are usually full of cr*p. Pretend that you went up to your attic this evening and opened up a trunk and when you unrolled the poster of whatever girl you had up on your wall in high school she magically came to life and was available for your sexual pleasure AND romantic interaction anytime you returned to the attic. Now, return downstairs to your marriage. Are you perfectly happy with it? Would your behavior and/or expectations change?
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
