Congratulations on your strength and courage. I agree with all that your H reaction is a defensive reading of how you are dealing with the situation with elegance. I believe he noticed that your resilience increased while he didn't work through his emotions to try to evolve. That's the downside for those who do not seek help, they are always one step behind. Now he does not know what to do and it looks like he is shooting everywhere just to see what he gets. The fact he is insisting on selling the house, in my opinion, is a block road for you not to leave him. You've said before he is a good father and I don't believe that he can go through with it in the end and he knows about it because he knows it will affect his children.
But you are brave and you will set the path and the rhythm by being an example. What he does not realize is that he is lost but you've left him a trail of "bread pieces" that he can follow when he is ready.
