she just told me that she is with someone elseHELP

[Michael Mc C]

Does it makes me sound like bad or mean person to say that I hope they do not last and that I hope this OM breaks it off with her??

This is a tricky one. No, I don't believe it makes you a bad person for thinking this and wishing it would happen. It is tricky though... do you wish unhappiness upon them or do you wish for this to end so that you feel that you have a fighting chance?

I told my wife over the weekend that she deserves to be happy. I didn't say anything about how she would go about getting it and just left it at that. Once she heard this, she started to cry. I had given her a gift by making that comment. I did not condone what she was doing (although maybe she thought I did). I simply acknowledged the fact that as my best friend for 20 years I would never wish suffering upon her.

As for wanting that fighting chance though, I am finding myself outgrowing that stage. That's not to say I find it a weak or immature position to be in, not by any stretch. It's just that I have so much more in my life to focus on than this. I no longer want to fight for my wife to come back. If she decides that what she had here was better then, okay, maybe we'll talk. I am not waiting for her to come to that realization. I am not interested in dating or moving into any new relationship. However I am not waiting for her. My life is moving on and if she's interested, she can try to catch up.