The evenings seem to be the hardest. It took everything I had to not think about the sich. My kids were home so thankfully they kept me a bit distracted.

I honestly was feeling a bit weak. I was putting some baby clothes away and looked around the babys room. I had this urge to send a pic to dh. Maybe to make him feel bad to see what he was missing, rub it in...I didn't send it.

When I was feeling weak I went over and over in my head why I was doing this. He wants to live 2 lives...one with me and one as a single man. Where was he on Saturday when I was in hospital? His relationships with OW and probably others. That is why I am doing this. Not because he is such a great guy and so dependable.

I want the easy to come soon....this withdrawl is so hard and the reality that dh is probably never going to be the man I want or need.

Me: 46 FWS: 36
Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07
Baby Girl born 3/08
Kicked him out because OW: 7/08
5/10 He realized what he had and lost.
Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!