I totally disagree, although unfortunately, my H would totally agree with this statement!
Conflict and anger in themselves are a part of life and can even be healthy. With anger, the trick is to focus on what your anger is trying to tell you, and then deal with that. And conflict can lead to growth and change. What is wrong with that?
I suppose what it comes down to is how you deal with conflict and anger. Some people, like my H, can't stand anger. He even said to me once, "How can you be angry with someone you love?" But even a calm discussion where we are not in agreement feels like a "fight" to him. I have become very careful to avoid discussing anything with him when I am upset or angry, and always make sure to seek his opinion on sticky issues. It's very tricky, but I think I am getting better at it, and it seems like we have better discussions. I still think he sees these disagreements as "fights" though. I'm still working on trying to make these discussions very peaceful and calm. I don't know if that will work, but I'm doing what I can.
