IT does make sense and ((((hugs)))) I was right where you are. My husband actually looked aged to. He was doing great but has backslid some. Turning into angry guy again. Not sure what's up with that. I have been smiling and keeping busy.
I know you are hurt. It's hard to be close and intimate with someone who hurts you and says bad things. I can remember giving in and having sex with my husband one time and I felt miserable the whole time. I couldn't wait for it to be over. He was very loving and even told me he loved me. He held me after and was very affectionate. But I kept thinking how can you act this way when you hate me. I just kept hearing the things he said in my mind. I couldn't forgive until he owned up to them and took them back. Not everything he said did he take back. But most of it he admitted to saying only to hurt me. During this talk he broke down into pieces. I have never seen him like that.
