You know T, that is a good question. I am not sure. I know I experienced it over and over. Just like you...where were you 5 years ago...you are a good father "now"....you are a good husband "now"...how long is this gonna last...you are just shaping up to get in my pants...spew, spew, spew...
I think yeah, it does throw off their plans. If we just remain the guys we were it is easy to leave. When we straighten out, it confuses them, it gets them wondering. I think it is VERY painful for a WAS to consider giving us another chance after they have erected all those walls. I also think they are pissed it took for things to get this bad for us to get it. I also think, that they think, we are full of it and will slip back to our old selves. It seems fake until we and they have lived it enough to believe in it. Those are my guesses. All I know is I have read about it here over and over and I lived it, and now you are living it. It is clearly part of a pretty well documented chain of events. Maybe "why" doesn't even matter. We could drink a lot of beers trying to figure this one out. Just know it is par for the course. Just because your wife is pissy at this point, it doesn't mean it's over. It means you are making headway. Lot more success stories around here lately it seems. Maybe you can be the next one. Keep up the good work.
As far as expectations, I mean, you have expectations as to how you think she should react to what you are doing and in what time frame. It will never work that way so lose those expectations. As far as expecting to save your marriage; some people would say lose that too and you won't be disappointed. I say, you gotta see it to be it. If you expect to succeed, maybe you will. If you expect to fail, you absolutely will. So that kind of expectation is good...IMHO
Me 44 She 46 S13 D9 M18 T23 3 years DB'ing Successfully busted
