WAW says "I'm filing for D", but no papers

[SirPrizeMe]

Hey Kerry! Thanks for the note of support. Keep strong, for yourself.

There appears to still be hope in your situation. It could be that your W is finding that taking care of 4 kids most of the time is more than she bargained for. She may be finding out that the grass is not greener.

YES! Gosh, I sure hope so. You know, she is great with the kids, really loves being a mom, and for a long time she's been the primary caregiver. She would die a happy woman if she got to do this full time, I think. While we were together, I was happy to support her in that vocation. so it's not so much the taking care of 4 kids most of the time is more than she bargained for. But that's close...

At this point, with papers filed, I think she is doing some arithmetic in her head. Finances, how to pay for things, how much maintenance she is likely to get. She's maybe realizing she'll need a job, a fulltime job. Maybe she is realizing that without a partner who provides an income, she cannot follow her desired vocation of being a fulltime mom. Well, not exactly, it's just that in addition to being a fulltime mom, she will have to work, she'll have less time to be "a mom", and she'll have much less money, and that means fewer vacations, smaller house, less outside help, etc.

I'll take my share of credit for not having made sure this was clear to her earlier, but we are where we are.
I'm just tryign to stay cheerful, let the right natural amount of pressure come through to her (eg, there are consequences to her actions) without being punitive or evem seeming to do so.

I have the same opinion as you have expressed in wanting to see my kids grow up under a happy family. You and I have so many things we want to still do together as a family.

Oh, yes. My truest desire. Everything is solvable if I can rebuild my family.