All I can hold on to is myself, kids and this site

[BEAUTYandWAH]

f21~ lwb~ Joie~
thanks for the post.
it seems like my biggest obstacle would be 'detaching' from him. There are lots of things I can learn from the website. I am reading over and over until I can really understand how to 'detaching'.

Here is one crazy event...
First two months, I did lots of things which considered to be 'wrong'. I tried to control him over and over. It worked sometimes but the outcome was not good at all.

About 2 months ago, OW threated myH she would move away if he would not choose her over me. MyH told me whats going on and I found out her moving day. I also knew it was the last day that myH could stop her from moving away and be with her.

So,the day before her moving day, I packed my stuff, got kids passport, took both kids to stay at my law-enforcement officer friend. He didn't know the location of the officer's house and also I knew he would not come/force into officer's home even he found where it was. I told kids that we were going to sleep over and have movie night with my friends. They were happy and didn't suspect anything wrong. I left the message to his family that I had enough and was leaving him and mentioned I got passports. All night, his family and he called my cell phone and were mad, crying, begging me to call them back. MyH was crying.


(according to myH..)
On OW's moving day, she called myH and told him "if you stop me right now, I will stay for you" MyH told her that he cannot stop her because it is too much to handle... he didn't know where kids and I were hiding from him. And she left the state.

Sometime the day, I came back. After long conversation with him , his family, I felt like I just needed to get out from the crazy situation. So, I decided to go a road trip with my friend who already had plan to leave the day.. I left the town for 5 days.

Sounds crazy... it was crazy. but I had time to calm myself down what I had done. The night at my friends' old friend's house, I fell asleep on couch for 14 hours (without sleeping pills!)

After the trip, I talked to lawyer, finding more information about divorce for just in case because I knew the problems with myH will continue. And I was right. I checked internet history. I guess he did not log out correctly so one of the site he visited opened. It was OW's nude picture. I got so mad and furious. But I made sure I saved the picture. It was my laptop, so the picture became my possession... in case if I want to make a extra large poster for myH someday. LOL
When I told my H about the picture, one of the thing I had to say was: 'tell your b**** to clean her room! thats disgusting!!!'


Joie, I really liked the website! Thank you. Just made me LOL
I found one idea that I may want to try.. IF I ever felt its over and I have nothing to loose. I don't think I can disclose the idea.. probably Too Much Information.. Nobody wants to hear what crazy person is thinking....

Anyone have ideas? I LOVE TO HEAR YOUR IDEA or STORY

Beauty