Picked up 5D from local event Saturday. Wife was working a booth. She did not see me arrive. She noticed me as I recrossed her path playing with 5D. She asked if I was leaving a told me all the things she had brought for 5D for the next 4 days I will be having her. 5D played on those inflatable jumpies or slides for awhile. I took the opportunity to talk to as many people as I could, a definite 180. When she was done working her booth and ready to leave, I was talking to a ex-colleague, female, of mine. I feel like she went out of her way to interrupted this conversation. I introduced them, then said excuse me. Wife restated what she had brought 5D, mostly clothes. I was able to ask wife how SHE got stains out of 5D clothes. She told me what she used and I ask what SHE did not the instructions. She talked about her morning at the parade and a friend and her kids ransacking the house. Then she left. No us. But pleasant and I had the proper demeanor.
I learned some things about myself that has made Sunday a bit difficult. 1) As hard as I try, I still stay some really stupid things that often are not even what I am thinking. Like Saturday, wife said she would pick up 5D at school. I made some statement like, "if you are going to". In reference to our restraunt meeting. It is not even what I meant. It is definitely what I said. I wanted to say that is the day 5D plays with a friend of hers at McDonald's and should have given that option to wife. 2) I realize I have done a lot of things in life because my parents did it that way. simple example, I took 5D to circus today. I realized after buying balloons and cotton candy for 5D that I never got those things when I went anywhere with parents. In fact, today was the first day I have had cotton candy. I am 35. Simply ridiculous to see the light after the wife says she is done. 3) Sundays are especially hard because I go to church and really reflect on mistakes I made in our marriage and desires to reconcile. I know all I can do is hope, pray, and leave her alone. 4) Everyone should read or listen to Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, several times. I learned that not only do I communicate like crap, but I have been in a cave for years due to job and activity done in my cave.
As I work through life, I am confident she will be there again one day. Despite it all...I know she will. If not, I will be ok, because I am learning about myself.
