Does anyone else have this problem?

[job]

Angelica,
There's no guarantee how they will reconnect and come home but the few that I have observed have returned exactly the same way that they left. Some will want to return immdiately and pick up the pieces and others will do it very slowly and take things day by day. The mlcer is the driving force in determining how they will re-enter reality and the relationship.

All we can do is sit back and observe. We have to follow their lead and when they do re-enter the world, we have to keep our expectations at zero as this is the hardest part of the journey--they are home and yet not all there. It all takes time once they are home. They are still very fragile and need to become stronger and inch their way along until they feel completely "safe" w/us and the relationship once again. The receipe is time, patience, compassion and learning to trust again.

[MissH]

it is hard not to take sexual rejection personally isn't it, however much we 'know' about MLC?

It sure is.

The thing is the OW is VERY sexually experienced - I mean more lovers than you can imagine.

So basically she IS A HO. If she has had so many lovers I am sure she will eventually get bored of your H and move on to the next one.

And that makes me feel inadequate.

Don't compare your self to a ho that gets around. You have so many attractive qualities while the only quality she has is that she gets around.

[angelica]

MrsH

So basically she IS A HO. If she has had so many lovers I am sure she will eventually get bored of your H and move on to the next one

.

That was my hope, BUT she is getting on, and I suspect that my h is the nicest man she ever met, by a mile, so she is hanging on for dear life.

[angelica]

Snodderly - one thing I do know is that there are NO guarantees, but curiously I could see him suddenly coming out of it. But who knows? I could still be here in five years!!!

He certainly went off like a firecracker!!!!


A

[MissH]

Angelica, how long have they been together?

[angelica]

EA started in August 05, PA October 05. It has been on and off since then. Four major break ups that I know of . . . . even h says they have had their ups and down.

People who know her say she is impossible!!

A

[MissH]

Well that doesn't sound like a healthy relationship, does it?

I mean, come on? 4 major break ups? Their R is doomed. It will end eventually.

If she is impossible I am sure your H will get sick of her eventually.

Is she younger than your H?

[angelica]

MrsH about 3 years younger, BUT she looks older than me!!

My h when he told me about it said 'She isn't as nice as you, she isn't as good looking and she isn't as intelligent as you, but I am in love with her'
You couldn't make it up could you?

A

[MissH]

'She isn't as nice as you, she isn't as good looking and she isn't as intelligent as you, but I am in love with her'

That's just proof he affaired down.

Do these MLCers ever realize how little sense they make?

[angelica]

Yes, but what hurts is that he prefers her!!!!

A