lwb first off thanks I do completely understand where you are coming from, yes it was devistating for me to find out that H was having and A, and I told myself that I would NEVER put H through that same pain, but I am about to. All of the doubts, trust, lies yup I have thought all about that. That is what is going to really suck about all of this. H is worried about reeling me back in I am going to have to do the same thing with him. I have thought long and hard about what I did to create this stich...and it comes down to communication and opportuinity.. That was the same when H had his. There were 'friends' that we leaned on that ended up not being friends after all, they were more or less waiting for the most opportune time to swoop down and 'save' us. Myself esteem at the time was at rock bottom. I equate it to getting kicked when you are already down kind of thing, but still it goes back to the communication that we did not have. H has addmitted to me that he has not been the most supportive or appreciative of me but that goes back to I did not let him know how I was feeling at the time. Remember I have been through this on the other side of the fence so I know that changes have to happen to both him and me and we need to work on this together or its not going to work. I know that I said that I am worried about hurting OM but he has not had the most luck with women that he really cares about in his life. About a year or so before things started he ended a 7 year relationship so there were scares there that need to be healed before he moved on. Oh when I tell H about OM there will be no contact what so ever with the OM period. As for what will happen first not sure I will have to play it by ear. I would like to talk to my counselor before I do do anything to talk throught it a bit before I do drop that bomb on both of them. And as for coming acrossed jaded I don't think that you did, like I said before I was on here before and tried to post about this and it was not received well, that is why I tied a new user name.
