You have had a really good attitude for being so early in your sitch. Good work! You are smart for posting your thoughts.
I see this in you as well, its amazing. I was a wreck when in your stage. You are doing so well, it will serve you in the end. Don't give in to the anger, don't call, don't accuse, until you are officially ready. And even then it has to be calm, or he won't listen.
