Get Me On A Smoother Ride....Need Advice #7

[Rob1231]

Hi Sue,

I agree with what's been said above - your H is one seriously alien-possessed, selfish, MLC-to-the-max nut case. Calmly planning ahead of time to get a DUI? What a maroon, as Bugs Bunny would say. Very scary.

As your H goes around doing these stupid things, my advice to you is to protect yourself. You can't control his stupid actions, but do be very aware of how they put you at risk.

First, think about protecting yourself financially. For example, what if he caused a wreck while driving drunk, and someone got seriously hurt or killed? Imagine the lawsuit - and imagine the repercussions on you if it came to light that you knew ahead of time he was planning to do this. As another scenario, suppose H decided to blow all of your savings on a new sports car? That would fit his MLC behavior to a "T". Is it time to set up your own checking and savings account?

Second, and I hate to say it, you need to think about STDs. You don't know what H has been up to - but if the self image he's painting for himself is drunken frat boy, that doesn't bode well to me.

Finally, I worry about you and D being around him when he's on such an emotional roller coaster, combined with the drinking. Your dad may never have been an angry drunk - but that doesn't promise your H never will be. This guy is just plain out of control. I hope these fears are unjustified, but please do step back from the sitch for a bit and think about it.

Remember, you can't control his actions - but you do control yours. That includes not setting yourself up to be a victim. Stay strong and focus on your own happiness - you and D deserve joy and peace, and (as is ALWAYS the case) it's up to you to make that happen. ((((Sue))))