Didn't the evil e-mail cause him to lose his job, though? That would make him evil and stupid, but technologically adept. Or, maybe, by losing his job, he gets to play victim to his wife, dump Mark's wife, but still destroy her M while he's at it. Yup, he's evil.
Me29 H33 D9 months S2 S9(previous R) Sep 8-19-07 I file 11-5-07 H home (Retro) 2-15-08 "Today is the tomorrow of yesterday." -- S9
You know at the end of the movie Ghost, when the demons come out and suck away the bad guy's soul to h3ll? I sure hope that's what really happens to people who are completely and totally immoral. It blows my mind that people can be so low.
Actually, I saw an interesting article today about people in Tehran being sentenced to death for immoral crimes! They didn't give the details of what they did. I vote that we send all immorals to Tehran!
Her father and step-mother are here now. Did not expect both of them to show up. I have no doubt she gave an extensive tale of woe on how miserable life with me is.
I was out this evening. Left, nobody was here. When I got back (after 11PM), only SMIL was awake. We exchanged pleasantries and small talk. Typical cordial adult talk.
I did not bring up our situation, nor did I probe her for information. Not my place to do that....
Whatever happens, will happen. I need to trust myself that I am strong enough to handle whatever comes my way. And I am a very strong person.
Yes, I am sure you are a very strong person. It's just that not everyone fights a fair fight. Lies need to be outed as you did this afternoon. I hope your wife will not go behind your back and lie to get what she wants.
I really hope you discover that your W's parents are some of your strongest supporters in this. If she has told them one tenth of the nutso cr@p that she's been spewing towards you, it's going to be obvious to them just how screwed up she is. You are a good man and you have a good relationship with them - no matter how frantically she tries to spin you into a monster and OM into a saint, I believe they are going to see through it. Parents aren't stupid - they watched her grow up, and they will know when she's on a good path and when she's way off the rails.
You don't need to argue the particulars of her lies with her, or justify yourself to her parents. Just keep standing strong and doing the right thing by yourself and your kids - that will carry more weight with the grandparents than any absurd "transcripts" or crazy suspicions. If she tries to go there, just shake your head, smile a sad, knowing smile, and give her parents a look that says "You see what kind of nonsense I'm having to put up with here?" - remember, YOU are the sane one in this sitch!
Hoping the best for you this weekend!
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
I really hope you discover that your W's parents are some of your strongest supporters in this.
They are exponentially pro-marriage. To the power of 11.
Originally Posted By: Rob1231
If she has told them one tenth of the nutso cr@p that she's been spewing towards you, it's going to be obvious to them just how screwed up she is.
As I have said, SMIL has MSW degree (does not practice, though), so she has training in counseling. And they are both LBS. In hindsight, in many ways, for her it's really a poor choice of people to be counseling with...
Originally Posted By: Rob1231
You are a good man and you have a good relationship with them - no matter how frantically she tries to spin you into a monster and OM into a saint, I believe they are going to see through it. Parents aren't stupid - they watched her grow up, and they will know when she's on a good path and when she's way off the rails.
Agree. And I have no doubt she did not spin OM into a saint. She's done with him. Mostly.
Originally Posted By: Rob1231
You don't need to argue the particulars of her lies with her, or justify yourself to her parents. Just keep standing strong and doing the right thing by yourself and your kids - that will carry more weight with the grandparents than any absurd "transcripts" or crazy suspicions. If she tries to go there, just shake your head, smile a sad, knowing smile, and give her parents a look that says "You see what kind of nonsense I'm having to put up with here?" - remember, YOU are the sane one in this sitch!
I considered, and even began composing, an email to send to the in-laws warning them to take what she has told them with a grain of salt. I didn't finish. I need to trust them, as adults (and LBS's!!!!) to know from where she is coming. They both have had the same spew blown at them (though it was 20+ years ago). And there will be no 4-part "confrontation" where I will say, "see what I'm dealing with?" It's really the last thing that she wants. Though I doubt it would happen, in the event of such a disagreement, I have no doubt that she would fear that her own parents would take my side (pro-marriage). So there will be no such "intervention."
Mark, glad you didn't probe SMIL for any information. That alone shows you have your head on straight. She is smart, maybe expected you to ask a few questions. But she knows you know why they are there. Its going to be rough, and I think W will definately give them the "I have no other choice, he is horrible" line more than once. GO LBS!!! We all need to stick together.
Another thought, if your SMIL has a MSW degree and training in counseling, perhaps she'll come to you to ask questions. Even if she doesn't, she knows there are 2 sides to every story. And I agree that parents know their kids. If they had the same spew thrown at them 20 years ago, they know...
Another thought, if your SMIL has a MSW degree and training in counseling, perhaps she'll come to you to ask questions. Even if she doesn't, she knows there are 2 sides to every story. And I agree that parents know their kids. If they had the same spew thrown at them 20 years ago, they know...
I don't think she will come to me. She is very pragmatic. She does not want to alienate my wife.
And you are correct. As I have said, she is smart enough to know the score.
