Thank you all. I want to respond to everybody's postings because they are all so insightful. But for now I am dealing with something else that I'd like to share...
Last night, H and I had to put our 11 1/2 year old Golden Retriever down. It was so hard and as I lie here at 2am, I am having a hard time.
She was sick for a few months. I knew it was coming. I know the right decision was made because she was getting worse with each day. Yet, I am surprised at how badly I am hurting right now. I thought I had prepared myself. But I am in pain.
It occurred to me that I feel things very strongly. All emotions... happiness, sadness, love, anger, anxiety, anticipation, hopelessness, hopefullness, etc... I realized that whatever emotion I am in, I feel it very strongly. So right now... tremendous sadness.
I miss my girl. Even though she was old and at the end of her life. Even though I have not paid any attention to her since my kids were born. Even though I had plenty of time to prepare. I miss her presence in my home.
Married 9 years Kids 5 and 6 Bomb 2006 H back and forth for a year M now back on track
