HELP! Can't take the way H talks to me!!

[not an ex yet]

I just read the quick recap in DNQ's thread. I have to utmost respect for those who are able to walk away, hurting, yet not giving in to the WAS. I am glad that things have been going well for you for awhile now!

I know what I have to do. I know (at least I think I do) what to say, how to act, etc. It seems like when the time comes, I do sometimes say the right things, or do the right things...then I panic at his response and turn around and do the wrong thing.

Here is a thought. I was thinking about him saying that I needed to start thinking before I talk and that I need to slow down. He said that several times..."SLOW DOWN." Do you think he was trying (very rudely I might add) to tell me to back off and give him the time and space to figure this all out? I kept asking for examples of what he was talking about. I was asking about what I did that particular night that he was referring to. He said, "it doesn't have to be about tonight...just think and slow down." He said that half of the things I ask I could answer myself if I would just pay attention. Do you think he was talking about us?
Sometimes I do ask him stupid questions about random things, mostly just for the sake of conversation or small talk? I told him that, and he said it didn't come off that way. I wonder if he was talking about these kinds of things or our R? Any thoughts? Am I just overanalyzing? I'm just wondering if there was something behind all his comments that night, or if he was just being an a$$hole!

He is horrible at communicating his feelings, which was most of our problem in the past. He would just go along with whatever I wanted or said, and would never speak up if he had other plans or ideas. He was just the "I don't care, whatever you want to do" kind of guy. Apparently he was slowly building up resentment about what he wasn't "getting" to do and I had no idea he was even wanting anything else.

It's time to get tough!! No more tears or guilt...I can do this!!! Why is it so scary?!