D Pretrial was Monday, and I didn't attend. My atty informed me that it went pretty well though, and that the judge didn't seem very happy with my W. W's atty has formally and officially withdrawn from the case, and W is now representing herself. Apparently the judge was getting frustrated with W and finally did get her to concede (relunctantly, I understand) that our house is my separate property. So, that was a major victory. Also, my atty said he's quite confident that the judge will not award my W any alimony or the $1000/month child support she is requesting. In fact, he doesn't think W will be awarded any child support money.
My atty has sent W an email with my settlement proposal, and I'm waiting to hear her response. If she's smart and is willing to fold to a hand that is obviously better than hers, she will take the offer. If she doesn't (i.e. if she's playing "pot committed"), she's going to come out of this with some substantial debt. It sucks, but it will be her choice. I'm just protecting what's rightfully mine at this point.
I have no desire to reconcile with W at this point. I'm really looking foward to getting this D over with and moving on. I will not take W back at this point. I'm still open to reconciliation, but not until she can demonstrate that she wants me for me and my changes, and not as a meal ticket, fall back, etc. Also, she will have to jump through the hoops of fire that I see are necessary (i.e. make changes in herself, her communication with me, etc), and do so for a long, yet indefinite amount of time, before I will even consider it. Her recent behaviors have helped me to truly let go of her. I'm better off without her -- no question.
I don't blame her for leaving me. Hell, I think it was the right thing to do (and I think I would've done it too if I were in her shoes). However, I do blame her for not doing everything in our power to give our R/M and our family a chance (i.e. IC, MC, longer separation period, etc). I accept that this is the way things are though, and that I did everything I could for me, her, and my family, in order to save our M. I can move on without guilt. I have forgiven myself, and I'm going to be great!
GALing:
I'm going on a date tonight with my new friend. We're going out for dinner and drinks, then on to a Dane Cook comedy show (I got front row seats). This is the woman that I had over with her S3 a few weeks ago for dinner and a kid's playdate. We've been talking on the phone off and on for the last few weeks, and I think we've both really enjoyed the conversation and the pace of things. No R talk, no expectations. Just hanging out and enjoying one another's company. No kissing, affection, etc, but that could change at anytime. I think we're both interested, but I'm definitely into taking it sloooooooowwwwwwwwwwww. I have NO DOUBT that she feels the same way.
