Thank you. Here's what I mean by HD/LD not being relative but rather a matter of perspective. The second or third time my 2bx tried to sexually hit on me after we separated he said "Why not? The sex was always great, wasn't it?" At the time, this just made me angry for obvious reasons. However, now that I've backed away from the relationship and gained perspective I realize that it was a perfectly reasonable thing for him to say. HE never had a problem with sex in our marriage. He got sex any time he wanted it and mostly it was fantastic. If he didn't want sex and I was being a pest all he had to do was imply that I was unattractive and my hurt bunny would hop away with my monkey or signal that he was sick/sad and my cow would shoo away my monkey. HIS problem with our marriage was that I had the crazy notion that he ought to work to support his children without too much complaint. OUR problem with our marriage was that our communication was so poor that I was shocked when he financially abandoned his children and he was shocked when I started dating/mating other men. We both believed that the other should have recognized the REAL problem. The truth was neither of us did.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
