Thanks, UD for your kind words. Change is inevitable - I am trying to change for the better - It is the only thing that I can control....
nephartiti - I think that guilt does play a huge role. But he hasn't shown interest in them in years. He goes to their stuff because he is expected to, not because he wants to. Even before all of this, I just thought that he would be a better dad....
Shades - do you think that one parent can make up for what the other parent doesn't do?
Anned - you know, I have asked both girls if they wanted to talk to someone. Both said no. D11 really is fine. D13 has even commented on how well she is doing and how this doesn't seem to affect her. D13 is very private and reserved. She refused to see someone and to force her would be a mistake. I did have her pediatrician talk to her privately and she told me that both girls recognize that this isn't their fault, and that they are both very well adjusted. She said that I should be proud of myself since the girls seem to be doing so well. She is D and said her kids weren't nearly that well adjusted. So I think that D13 is like me...she just gets sad sometimes and wants some answers.
Peace - my R with my kids is so much better. I am more patient, much more patient. I'm not really afraid of being the only parent - I am just sad that he is missing out on these terrific kid. It is hard for me to understand.... And you are right - my kids will eventually know that I tried. They are too young now, but they will eventually know my beliefs.
