IC brought this up yesterday, too. She pointed out that I would end up taking care of the in-laws (and she knows that I would of course step up and do that--but they also have 5 biological children)--is that moving forward/healthy? How would I be able to be comfortable and date in the future?
Point driven home today: H called me, asked if I was spending time with the kids when I had them for the weekend...wtf?
Apparently, CW has been logging my comings and goings and reporting back to him.
I didn't get the connection at first; it was so out of left field.
Her H called me and woke me up from a nap this afternoon--did I send him an email about a dating site? No......... then, he mentioned that he saw a Mustang drop me off the other night (it didn't drop me off--I went outside to say hello in the driveway--not that it is ANYone of their business!!!). I just said no and hung up.
So, I want the house. I'll buy him out if I have to. Then I am going to sell it and get something smaller in a neighboring town.
*******
Spoke with the IC again today on the phone. Had a panick attack about the impending "forever" of this sitch. Even she said that I need to get well, and that H will not be in that new picture.
I thought a lot about that today. I can see that I have to get well, do certain things to do that. And I know that it was the dynamic between the TWO of us that brought us here.
Why do I have to do this alone? Can't anyone help him see the role he played? She said that he isn't willing to see it, doesn't want to see it... but he did today. When he called me, I asked him, and he said he would talk to her to try to understand the whys behind everything. I don't know if he means it or not. I do know that, even with understanding, it may not bring him around. But I just want him to not yell at me anymore, hate me so much....he always assumes the worse about me, now.
All that will have to happen after the meeting tomorrow. And that will be all business. The Ls will make sure of that.
