Wow some very interesting reading on my thread. Thank you so much. Everything said has been helpful. H has told me point blank he is afraid of things going back to 'normal' (meaning bad) and afraid I'll never forgive him. He was very surprised when I told him he should have left me, then had the A with OW. He couldn't see how it would hurt less.
OW's H called me this morning. He is filing for a D in the morning!! He told OW in counseling, she broke down in tears, begging him to at least separate. OW's H will not do separation because in our case it just means more 'dating' of my H. He told her he can't do it anymore. She basically in a round about way told him she wants to stay married AND see my H. Yeah. Want some ice cream with that cake..not gonna happen.
Of course, this change may upheave my life quite a bit, I bet H will leave and pursue her if she is 'free'. However, maybe this will be a 2 X 4 for her...doubtful. He closed credit card accounts today and is getting a separate checking acct tomorrow. WOW. Just WOW. I feel for him, he is basically doing something he doesn't even want, but knows he has to do it. He is going to keep me posted. Poor guy.
