IC, You are the embodiment of spirit, and I really needed to hear those words today. I have said this to Sandi about her H, but it is true of me as well: it is fear that holds me back. My marriage has been one big ironic mess...at the point where my sex drive returned and I wanted to get all playful with my H, he had checked out of the marriage. In our fusion, we have undermined each other's confidence and esteem. It's taking a lot of work to get back on track...it's been the typical two steps forward, one step back, one step forward, two back, well, you get the idea. I stumble over my own LDness and The Past. I want so much for my marriage to work...we have come so far, and I feel I have a healthy path and sense of purpose. I love and need all that. I love my H and want him to be the best he can be; it kills me that this boy I met at 21, who was my friend and helped me through so much, ended up getting caught up in lies and deceit. If you see him now he is so happy to have his family. Last night he surpised us by setting up the dining room for Thanksgiving, and had a Turkey meal ready with all the trimmings. Okay, it came from Boston Market, but the thought was so precious: he wanted us to have Thanksgiving at home, just the 4 of us. He's been playful, cute and sexy too...the whole package....and I still feel he doesn't want me? Gotta work on this.
Thank you, IC, for helping me make this work...you are a true spiritman.
