I"m in agony here...

[bombardier50]

Realjourney, she hasn't really sought any help. Of course, in my desperation, I asked her to go see a doctor (a common, and dumb request) because I suspected a menopause/hormonal thing. She never went. I suggested that either she or we talk to my coach. She didn't want to do counseling "over the phone." Her answer to the problem has two parts: a) we've changed, and b) it's all my fault. Now I admit, I haven't always been the world's greatest husband, but not the world's worst either. I will say this, her sister, who is slightly older, hit menopause like a brick wall, and put her husband through the same nightmare. They managed to stay together, but he's like a zombie.

Hairdog, I feel pretty certain she's not having an affair. Just a gut feeling, but I've never been suspicious. She's a horrible liar. Besides...she does say she still loves me, and I think she does. We just can't get through this wall, and I'm bloody, bruised, and exasperated from beating my head against it.