Thanks for your advice. I know you're all trying to row the boat in the same direction.
Hill is probably right. I can't do much about my situation here. I will send her a birthday card in about a week. She will probably be aggravated by it, because that's how she reacts. I have snet emails regarding the kids and Christmas. No response. I have informed her that I need to start putting some money away after the holidays. No response. emailed her to have a good holiday. No response. But in each case, none expected, so I'm not ripped up as I was one year ago today.
I guess that I have come to some realizations:
1. I'm acting "as if". As if my marriage is over. There has been not one inkling of a change in a year. As a mater of fact, she wrote to me a while ago and said "my position and feelings about our marriage are hte same as they were for the past several years". Check. Roger. Got it.
2. I have mentally prepared myself to not live in my old home upon return, but another part of me wants to just go home and scream at her to get out of the house. She wants out, not me.
3. What really kill me is my kids. The thought of them being without an intact family kills me, as do the memories of 18 years worth of them as babies, toddlers and kids.....
COG, To a certain extent I agree with you, but I have changed some things dramatically, and some for the better. I gave until I had nothing to give, in order to try and make things right...which they never were.
I think she has flipped off the switch, and that's it. Period. I don't want to quit, but she is still battling with my older daughter. I see it through the parent portal at D17's school.
Couls it be that my wife has some real issues and that maybe, a lot of this IS on her? Mostly everyone I know knows what she is about, and they get her total inflexibility and anger.
COG: You've read these posts for over a year. You've told me that my W. is not right.
