new here. Feel like dying

[ms ladybug]

I'm sorry I agreed to his conditions as well. The hardest condition (moving) is NOT going to happen until/unless things are well resolved between us. I think we'd both agree on that.
We're not in central LA. We're in central CA, which is about 4hrs north of LA. But, we are in what is considered the "meth capitol". So, yes a lot of crap here. Drugs, crime, prostitution, etc... (where he works. Not where we live.) HE thinks if we move to TN his job will consist of helping old ladies cross the street and the such. WHICH, I think would bore him to death. He likes the danger (SWAT, bomb disposal, etc...). But honestly, a don't think I'd see a new side of him. He's changed his job several times, always looking for what could make him happy...that I don't believe he knows how to be happy. TN or CA, cop or...RN, or whatever "job de jour" he chooses. He's not a happy person.

I think the whole lawn mowing thing was just to push my buttons. He knows damn well that he had nothing to do, and very well could have come mow the lawn. I'm kinda glad I did it. I was able to work-off some aggression pushing that thing (once I figured out how to get it started).

That night I was so mad I changed the ringtone on my cell-phone for when h calls me. Instead of ringing to Keith Urban's "Who's your daddy?" it rings to the Veronica's "leave me alone." I know Dom will tell me this is disrepectful, but it felt good. And, h doesn't hear my phone ring when he calls me anyway.

So, now I've agreed to his conditions. Oh, this could so lead to a meltdown on my part...