Why can't I do this....

[Dom R]

I think that she knows that I would not cave in on some of the issues for that to happen.

you dont konw that. she doesnt know that. what she knows, is that you are caving to anything she asks.

She called me a bit ago and asked me what I was doing tonight. Told her I didn't know but I would have a long day at work with month end and all. She told me that she was hoping that I would come hang out with her and the kids...


Then she told me that she missed having me at the house this am to help with the boys.

that's really nice! i'm happy for you :-)

I know that you think that this is a choice on my part to "move out" and walk away, but the biggest 180 that I can do at this time is to eliminate the anxiety in her life rather than add to it. And I think that I am doing a fine job of that.... now to transfer those positives into additional opportunities to show my commitment.

no, the "biggest 180 that you could do", would be to grow a beard, change your name, and move to alaska.
"bigger" isnt always "better"!

Why do you possibly think that the only way for you to eliminate the anxiety in her life, is to move out???

I think you need to be more creative... no, make that more HELPFUL... in what you do for your wife.

you cant help her, if you are not there.

sounds like she's realising that. that's great!

I suggest that you work with that.
maybe work out with her, ground rules for how you could stay in the house, and be helpful with the kids, etc, without "increasing her anxiety".