Andy, I couldn't agree with you more. When you take the emotional part of making a decision logic sets in. This is what happened in the dealings with my ex wife. Logically, if you can get their attention long enough you can make them see things for what they are. Stay away from lawyers for as long as you can, these people make their living of praying on peoples misery. Going dark puts you in the logic realm. In my situation I feel like I am slowly starting to build a bridge back for my wife, she was a WAW. I had an affair, 3 years ago we reconciled and then all of a sudden she just said she couldn't deal with it. She said she wanted a divorce and then she would be able to heal. There were alot of hurtful things that were said in that time, including her having affairs with several married men. And now that she got what she wanted she is not happy at all. I am in another relationship which is going really well, my gf treats my son as if her were her own. My wife admitted that it is bothering her, inside she is still really nice but she broke down in tears when she told me how she felt. The fact that she cried still shows me that she cares, the opposite of love is indifference. She still cares what happens to me. In a way she is almost mad at me that I went dark, but it was the only way for me. Trying to win her back the other way just made me push her farther away in the very beginning. Now that the fog has lifted she is seeing things for what they are. I think she feels she may have made a mistake, and only time will tell what will be the outcome, but I would have never reached this stage if I had not gone dark.
