Reelin' in the Years

[SallyM]

omg. seriously, I would love to get your w and my h in a room and listen to who could come up with the biggest line of crap yet. they are so freaking clueless, or extraordinarily cruel, that they can say stuff like your wife did, about learning about herself. talk about a fog...the fact that she LIKES what she learned about herself is revolting.

yep, like lwb, I'd say you have learned a lot about yourself, too. but there are sure as shooting better ways of learning about inner strength and resolve than dealing with this.

[Ohio_Mark]

Oh, no Sally... it was all worth it!!!

Actually, I wish you (and lwb) coulda been in the room to tell my wife what an idiot she is, and how her friends are idiots as well. Maybe whacked her in the head with a newspaper...

[Sara]

I want to be there too. And Saffie would whip her with the cat 0'nine tails.

Your wife has an ugly mouth. She will regret all of this someday. But you will be long gone.

[SallyM]

sara, if she's anything like my h, she'll just deny the conversation ever took place.

loving the idea of whacking her with a newspaper. lol. and yeah, sic saffie on her, too.

[Sara]

If she only knew how many people have learned a lot about her as a result of her affair, I think she'd be surprised!

[Hurtin4certain]

Hey Mark... I read somewhere that at the base of most anger is pain. She's lashing out because deep down she is hurt for some reason. Maybe she's hurt that you have let go and refuse to play her games???

When my W left me a few years ago and initiated a D, she was extremely cruel. In actuality, she was a broken woman.

Have you ever considered having a genuine heart to heart with her? That might fly in the face of DB, but what have you got to lose at this point? Tell her you love her and that you want more than anything to have your family whole again(even if you only feel 50/50 about it).

I get the feeling she is looking for you to reach out to her... I certainly understand if you dont think you can do that at this point but, somethings gotta give. Maybe its your marriage or your pride.

[Ohio_Mark]

Hey Mark... I read somewhere that at the base of most anger is pain. She's lashing out because deep down she is hurt for some reason. Maybe she's hurt that you have let go and refuse to play her games???

Thanks for the post on my thread. She is hurt because I emotionally abandoned her. And I did. Of course, she has exaggerated it, but, no matter. The damage is done.

Have you ever considered having a genuine heart to heart with her? That might fly in the face of DB, but what have you got to lose at this point? Tell her you love her and that you want more than anything to have your family whole again(even if you only feel 50/50 about it).

This discussion would have no benefit at all. She knows I would like to have the family whole. But what she wants and what I want are two very different things (see below).

I get the feeling she is looking for you to reach out to her... I certainly understand if you dont think you can do that at this point but, somethings gotta give. Maybe its your marriage or your pride.

She is not looking for me to reach out to her. She is waiting for her boyfriend to move to this area (after our divorce is final). He is her soulmate, her ideal person. And I am not.

Yeah, I get the whole fantasy thing. I'm not beating myself up over this. Look, she will permit only one person to reach out to her, and it isn't me. I'm not upset about it any more. I don't have any tears for myself.... only for my kids...

[Hurtin4certain]

Who's to say you cant be her ideal person? Sure, theres been lots of damage that already taken place, but its never too late to at least try.

Whats so different about her bf than you?

[Yoyowife]

Man, what a biotch! She is heartless! Mark, I'm so sorry. Unreal that the person pledged to love you has turned into such uncaring person. Sorry to go on the rampage, but boy she makes me mad!!!! We all have faults, but under not cirmcumstances did you cause her to become the person she has.

[Dr LOve]

Hey mark,

take care buddy. It's a new day. you are on the right path taking care of you and your kids. After all that is all we can really do.
Someday hopefully your W will see the light. I am beginning to see myself that eventhough I would do anything for my son, somethings were ment to be..

Husband