As a virtual present for you, Dr. Mojo has decided to take on your case. I feel that I have valuable insight to offer in terms of diagnosis since I am currently dating a man who half reminds me of you and although I am semi-loath to admit it, BB has always half reminded me of me. Your description of her dating/petting behavior with you in your youth makes it clear that she is a natural "bunkey" sexually.
First off, a very important question that will help me determine whether your case is terminal. If you were to become ill with some sort of dangerous fever-producing illness like Typhoid and you were rendered unable to do or even think about any of your usual uber-responsible Lou things, do you believe that BB would take care of you? IMPORTANT NOTE: By taking care of you, I mean do her best in her own way to nurse you back to health. I do NOT mean do things the way you would. For instance, she gets points for buying you the electrolyte drink that she thinks tastes better rather than the one that costs less.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
