Yeah, once y'all (word proves I'm from TN!) move to TN and become residents, you would have a hard time moving the kids back to Cali. TN is a no-fault state too. A D would mean 50/50 division of assets and child support based on custody.
Aside from the nuances of divorce law, STAY PUT... Unless some gross detail of you sitch is missing from your account, it sounds like your H is a real piece of work. Moving will not take care of the problems. Address them right where you are at.
