they do get irrational and uncooperative, I hear you, stay your ground and dont' give tit for tat.

The book I suggested won't contradict DR at all, it is a good read. My H also took all his stuff (most of it before he left in secret btw).

I still have trouble communicating with him at all.
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That's the core of everyone's problem hon, just remember to watch the tone of your voice, you can be saying one thing while your tone of voice and body language say another. Hang in there. DECIDE to have a good thanksgiving regardless, you and the kids deserve a nice holiday, detach and make the conscious desicion to be happy))

Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2

30something
2kids
survivor of S, MLC, A, D
I have peace in my heart, at last.