Dead Man, I think you have been given some great advice from everyone. Use the energy you have about thinking of your wife for your kids instead, or even for yourself. You should probably stop reading the "how to win her back" books, as I think your GAD will get worse, trust me I have been there myself. The best thing I can tell you what has started to work for me, was to be my ex wife's friend. I mean a real friend not someone with alterior motives. Let her come to you, but in turn you need to be open. Eventually she may have a serious crisis and turn to you. In that case you have your foot in the door and be non judgemental, and really try to help. In my case my stepmother told me that she thinks my wife is a strange bird, not in a bad way but requires a certain level of tolerance. She also said the same thing about me, being the artsy type that I am. In time she may realize that no one knows her like me and when we are in sync we are fantastic. Real love never dies, and that is the only hope that I can hang on to. You need to let her relationship play itself out and be a good listener, she may see something in you then that was not obvious before due to the way that you interacted. You were married along time, and that is a giant investment. Good luck and keep your chin up.
