Okay, I'll get to responding to people later (including the whole "homeless" issue). But the first order of business is that I have to deal with the fact that my new method of breaking up with men when they behave badly is apparently ineffective. I should backtrack/review a bit here. I know this may seem odd but I am actually greatly relieved to be back in the world of men as I knew it before my marriage which is a world in which men want to have sex with me but behave badly. It is not an entirely happy world but it is one in which I at least understand my role and the rules by which it is governed. In the olden days of my youth before I understood the concepts of fusion etc. due to my personality type my usual reaction to "bad" male behavior was to cry and retreat (injured bunny in the hole). I would only become angry upon receipt of the pretty much inevitable "booty call". (I should perhaps note here that "bad" male behavior never makes me LD for sex before it makes me LD for the relationship. I'm always at least "willing" to have sex with "my man" until he turns into "the jerk who used to be my man") Anyway, for a while it seemed to me that some people on this BB were giving me the advice that I should try to turn myself into someone who naturally has an angry reaction rather than a crying reaction to bad behavior and I was resistant to that concept for good reasons. However, I am reacting differently these days and I don't know if that means that I am more differentiated or just having a different dysfunctionally fused reaction. Unfortunately, I am going to have to resort to use of my animal analogy to explain. Pretty much what is happening these days is that when men mishandle my bunny, my cow comes out dressed like a nice but rather strict librarian-type and signals kindly and very, very politely "I am so sorry that a nice boy like you apparently does not know how to handle the bunny or does not wish to make use of that knowledge. I am afraid that means that you will have to exit the zoo. Have a good day."
Okay, back to the matter at hand. I signaled this to GP and he responded by becoming super-apologetic but with a tinge of "I'm going to be p*ssed if you don't accept my apology." so I signaled it again and he went away and I decided that it was for the best. However, he showed up at the zoo gates again this morning acting like nothing happened so now I don't know what to do.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
