having a really hard time. saw the pysch--she said she can't do anything more for me. Spoke with the the IC, she wants me to focus on me again. I'll probably see her today and tomrrow again. Rolled over at 2 and I'm up--right thru the lunesta and klondopin. Went to an AlAnon meeting last night--H took S to therapy. I finally rolled and told S he could go where he wanted to for Thanksgiving.
I hate this life. I don't want it. I don't want to start over. I don't want to hear that things happen for a reason, that I will find happiness on my own someday.
Its been a year. I am lonely. I miss the person who I pledged to love for all my days. I don't know where he went.
I don't know how I am going to survive this broken heart, let alone accept it.
