(((hugs))) sorry I haven't been around. My friend you make me sad, and she makes me angry. I wish there was something I could say or do to make it easier on you.
But no words can help what your feeling.I know that you are really detaching from her. I did want to know, what if you were to say something to her regarding your R.. I know it may be a no no to do this but I hate to see you hanging here and for so long.
I think the "not Knowing" is the worst part.
Email me if you can.. worried about you.. if you forgot..tem420@gmail.com
Thinking of you..
tal
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
I am getting very tired. Tired of waiting. Tired of knowing she is spending hours a day on the telephone with her boyfriend. Tired of knowing that the last man she has had sex with was not me. Tired of being treated like an acquaintance. A doormat.
TAL, I sense that the time is coming very soon where I will tell her to $hit or get the F*** of the pot. Choose. Not sure when, but we will have this discussion very soon.
I know that I deserve better than this. I can do better than this. It's time. Is this my lot in life? Our lot?? I think not, not for any of us who are reading this. We all deserve better.
I know that a lot of this is my depression talking. I have an appointment to see my doctor (if you recall, I was on Cymbalta for two weeks... ditched it because of insomnia - been taking nothing for a few months now). I need an AD.
Thanks for checking in on me ladies. You're all swell....just swell.
I spoke to my step-MIL today (I called to thank her for sending a gift to our family). She invited us to go to see her and my FIL (and my wife's step-bro & his wife) for TG (they live about 200 miles away).
Here is my thought... What if I act "as-if?" Act as-if we were going. Pack some clothes for the kids, get the car ready, etc. And if she says we are not going to visit, then I just tell her we are going anyway, throw the kids in the car, and drive off without her... tell me why this would be a bad idea. Somebody talk me out of this...
For the record, the family on "my side" has nothing planned.
I don't see any downside to this. It may alienate her, but if she is alienated, it is of her own doing. It's her family, but...
What do you have to lose?? If you feel totally comfortable with them, then I would go and since they invited you then I say go for it!!
Really, what do you have to lose.. the worse that could happen is that she will move thing along faster, which might be better for your emotionally not to be hanging out anymore, or it will force her to maybe think about what she is doing..
tal
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
Hey mark, since your family has nothing planned and if you get along fine with the IL's. Go for it. It will be nice for the kids. they probaly have not ween them for a while.
Husband
Last edited by husband; 11/20/0701:22 AM.
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
I don't get the surprise element. Why not just say, "I assume we're going to your family for Thanksgiving this year. I know they're expecting us." and then do everything you just said, but let her know it's coming.
Yeah, Sara, it occurred to me that the surprise would be a bad idea. Unnecessary. I don't mind saying I spoke to step-MIL - this would not be unusual. I will presume that we are going.
