okay, the cat's meow, or the cat's pajamas? inquiring minds want to know, lol!
mark, I get that, about being denied the companionship you crave.
a year ago I had everything I ever wanted. well, not a villa in france, but I had a man I loved and knew would be there for life, I had 3 great kids, a nice house, my h provides well for us, a life where I finally felt like the light at the end of the tunnel was near (some rough times when the 3 were younger). I remember last october was our first real family vacation...not a trip to visit family, but a real stay-in-a-hotel fly-on-a-plan trip. and it was great! I just thought good times were ahead...it would only get better and better. I even finally started having real dinner parties again...with grownups coming over after the kids go to bed (my kids were light sleepers for a long time, it wasn't smart to even think about this). I had so many plans, so many visions for how great our life was.
little did I know.
I have a lot of resentment at having the rug pulled out from under me. I am angry that I am suddenly alone...celibate...lonely. yeah, I know I could remedy that part tomorrow if I wanted to, but that's not what I want either. and I'm mad that my kids won't grow up in a home with mommy and daddy together. hell, my twins won't even remember us ever being a family.
so yeah, I get it. I don't have a time frame in mind like you do, no 6 or 12 months for me. I'll fill that void when I'm ready, might be shorter, might be longer, who knows. but hopefully I will fill it.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
